Things are finally looking up!

Not that things were looking down...they were just static, I suppose. The highlight of each day was being mobbed by my cats. However, things are about to get exciting! I was approved for my student loan (with NO co-signer!) which means I can finally move out of my childhood home and into a place of my own. This also means I won't fill my gas tank three times a week. Exciting happening number two is this: I am going to California over spring break to visit my dear friend Amber. I am also going to Tijuana, Mexico. I look forward to such things as; seeing my first palm tree, seeing my first cactus, not being robbed in the crap hole border-town that is Tijuana, and seeing the Pacific Ocean for the first time.

Just in case...

I thought I should let everyone know that I will be away from the internet until the 11th. This is (I know Jaclyn feels me on this!) due to FINALS WEEK and term papers, etc...As a senior...I actually have to be strict! I shall return an exhausted woman after the 4th. This message is mostly to force myself to stay away from the computer!

To cheer things up a bit...

after the sadness of my TREES *mourn* which I'm sure had you all weeping along with me...


This is probably the best picture I've ever seen in my life - well, recently, anyway...




TELEPORTATION!!!

Men as trees...

I came home from work just now to discover that all the trees in my yard were being cut down. I understand the one dead tree in the back yard, but not the ones in front of my windows. I feel as if I'm going to die. Those close to me (and who used to be) know how difficult it is living in this house. One of the very few joys of living in this house was watching the squirrels play around on those trees. My stomach is digesting itself. I'm struggling desperately to hold back the tears. With the destruction of these trees comes the destruction of my dear squirrels' homes. The squirrels are so dear to me. They greet me when I leave the front door, following me to my car...they watch me do my homework and tease my cats...Regardless of whether or not the reader believes in totem animals, I recently was told by someone that my totem is the squirrel (just thought I'd throw that in for a melodramatic touch). In all seriousness, I feel like a part of my ability to feel joy is dying. I'm losing so much with these trees. I just now lost my fight with the tears. At any rate, I no longer have anything keeping me in this house. My happiness is gone.

Japanese Speech Contest!

Everyone, please wish me luck and think of me tomorrow between 12pm and 1pm, as I will be entering my first Japanese speech contest at my university. The prize is $50 and I am really nervous!

Dad: What's that thing on your desktop?

Me: What? What thing?

Dad: That thing! That photo!

Me: OOOH, you mean my wallpaper?

Dad: Yeah.

Me: Its a guinea pig dressed up like a bee.

Dad: ...

What the hell?

Today, I walked into Borders a woman. I walked out the singer for an experimental jazz project. I'm interested to see how this turns out. I don't even like jazz!


I have no other option but to leave you with this: The Bee-nea pig.

Retirement is overrated.

I was scanning the faculty of U of T's EAS graduate department, only to find that the professor I had my heart set on working with (not to mention all those long nights passionately reading her work as my toes curled and uncurled with excitement) has fucking retired! I never thought the word "emeritus" could make me feel so ill. There is another professor on the faculty; Atsuko Sakaki, who does work in gender studies...but its just not the same. I just don't know what to do...

Considering gender studies in Japanese literature alone - not to mention classical Japanese literature - is a fairly new field, its incredibly difficult for me to find a graduate program that not only has Japanese literature, but also faculty members interested in gender studies. It doesn't help that Dr. Sakaki is far more intimidating than Dr. Arntzen. Oh well, I shall perservere! When I write my first book, I'll get you all signed copies.